Hand Jobs: 10 Awesome Pimp Slaps In Movies And TV

Working on a pop culture site, you naturally receive tons of pre-theatrical release movie screeners and free advance DVD copies—it’s what we like to call “swag,” bitches (don’t be jealous). And, every once in a while, a new disc will pop up in our mailroom that introduces us to an obscure flick we’d otherwise never know about; case in point, Sledgehammer, a little-seen slasher movie from 1983 that, as the synopsis on the back of the DVD case informed us, was shot on video tape.

Fascinated, we wanted to get a taste of what Sledgehammer has to offer, so we consulted trusty old YouTube. What we came across lifted an otherwise dismissible ’80s horror flick to pure guilty pleasure. The first clip we found culminates with a creepy kid giving the film’s hero a mighty face slap, needlessly presented in slow motion. And just like that, we fell in love with Sledgehammer.

After re-watching the scene a few times, and laughing our asses off with each viewing, we started to think about some other great blows to people’s mugs. So, kicked off by Sledgehammer’s aforementioned moment of illogical excellence, we’re about to brighten your day with 10 Awesome Pimp Slaps In Movies And TV. Because, let’s be honest—who doesn’t enjoy watching others get cheek-checked every now and then?



well, u smoke crack, dont’cha ?

Lean On Me (1989)

Morgan Freeman’s take on real life school principal Joe Clark in the film Lean On Me helped propel Freeman to Hollywood stardom.

In this classic scene from Lean On Me, Freeman confronts a troublemaking student who Clark learns has a crack problem.

Freeman starred as high school principal Joe Clark in 1989’s ‘Lean on Me.’ The film was based on a real-life Paterson, N.J. high school

” they used to call me  ‘crazy Joe’, now they can call me  ‘Batman’ “.


(one of) The 50 Worst Actors In Hollywood History

Worst Performances: The Animal (2001), The Benchwarmers (2006), I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry (2007), Big Stan (2008)


Rob Schneider is the Memphis Bleek of Hollywood, a lower-tier performer who’ll keep getting work as long as his primetime friend (Adam Sandler, rather than Jay-Z) never retires. He’s Sandler’s go-to guy when a racial stereotype needs abusing. By exaggerating every stereotype hurled at the respective culture imaginable, Schneider has shamed the following: Asians (I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry), Pacific Islanders (50 First Dates), and Arabs (You Don’t Mess With The Zohan). Now that‘s a trilogy of terror.


The 50 Most Racist Movies

Complex runs down the flicks that you might not have realized were wildly offensive. Turn on your racist radars, people!

(click above pic for full article)


complex’ 50 most stylish villains of all time


F a hero, if you want to talk about truly slick sartorial game and genuine fashion flair it’s all about the crooked, evildoing bad guys. In celebration of all smarmy dudes from oily, dream-killing kabillionaires like Simon Cowell to sticking-up-septuagenarians-to-stunt-in-Savile-Row-suits-types like Conrad Black; and the iconic blue-and-white banker button-ups of Gordon Gekko to the aspirational T-shirt game of Tyler Durden, we got it all. So as an homage to homicidal lunacy, sociopathic money grubbing, the unmistakably bespoke break of a cashmere pant leg, AND this weekend’s release of Wall Street 2: Money Never Sleeps (!!!!), we bring you The 50 Most Stylish Villains


Marked For Death

Steven Seagal plays a cop who confronts a voodoo priest, Screwface, and his Jamaican Posse, a cartoonish gang of dreadlocked drug dealers who have been shooting up the hood and stringing out school kids. After painting peace-loving Rastafarians as a snarling, dope-dealing menace—and putting out his horrific reggae album, Songs from the Crystal Cave—the ponytailed one can’t ever show his face in Jamrock again. 


seven pounds

drive, or use ure cellphone.  pick 1… just 1.


ninja assassin & hurt locker


cee them


cee it!

‘Avatar’ Is Officially The Highest Grossing Movie Ever!

It was only a matter of time, but now, James Cameron’s Avatar has officially become the highest grossing movie of all-time, upstaging the director’s last film … 1997’s Titanic.

After topping the box office for six consecutive weeks, the sci-fi epic sunk the boat on Monday (January 25), raking up a total of $1.85 billion in ticket sales, edging Titanic’s $1.84 billion. Also, it was done in less than 40 days.

While Avatar’s worldwide totals are the most ever, it’s domestic take of $554.9 million still slightly trails Titanic’s $600.7 million, but overseas it has taken in slightly more, $1.30 billion to the earlier film’s $1.24 billion.

According to the L.A. Times, the 1997 flick still wins in terms of the number of the number of actual people who went and saw the film.

The paper says that, domestic ticket sales for “Avatar” would have to reach $925 million in today’s dollars to match, on an inflation-adjusted basis, the box office that Titanic achieved in 1997. Given the current estimated average ticket prices of $7.46, Avatar still needs to sell about 50 million more tickets before it matches the inflation-adjusted domestic gross of Titanic.

That may still be a shot in the dark though.

Wow … has anyone not seen this movie yet?




. . . scary

links to DL 2012 here


  • behind da barz

    --------the chemicals R identical, we're one & the same / with 7 letters in all 3 of my government names / walked on water, nah, neither did jesus / its a parable to make followers & readers believers--------i gave her my honorable discharge & she took it like a soldier--------what's a black beetle anyway, a fuckin roach-------she told the director she tryna get in a school-he said "take them glasses off and get in the pool"---------what ya'll call swag to me is faggotry-------my outfit so disrespectful / u go 'head n sneeze let my presence bless u--------its quite amazing that u rhyme like u do / & how u shine like u grew up in a shrine in peru-------its hard fuckin with niggaz u hope u can trust / ure a fool if ure main bitch is easy to fuck--------beyond the walls of intelligence life is divine / i think of crime when im in a new york state of mind - ------THE WAY SOME ACT IN RAP IS KINDA WACK / IT LACKS CREATIVITY & INTELLIGENCE / BUT THEY DON'T CARE BECAUSE THEIR COMPANY IS SELLING IT / ITS MY PHILOSOPHY ON THE INDUSTRY--------From days I wasn't "Abel/able", there was always "Cain/caine-------know how to leave anything in 30 seconds / when you feel the heat coming & flee with the murder weapon--------ayo my silent moments' loud as the crack of thunder / my hunger like the crocodile that attacked the hunter-------i'm something between platinum & flop, underground & mainstream / conscious, backpack, scratch dat; same thing---------this phiscal year im'a stay hot, buzzin / wit dudes that help me shoot like a-rod's cousin-------i fight chicks who bite dicks / give 'em lock-jaw then make 'em fight pits ------all we see is terrorism on telievision ------i'm da illest nigga alive watch me prove it / i'll snatch your crown with your head still attatched to it ------slap your face till your head ache your neck break / the next day slash your throat thru the neckbrace ------ I'm ahead of the game, ahead of these lames / I'm a head case, the head nurse gets me better with brain ------ure now dealin with da kid who heat-holds & reloads / like god gave him a gta ammunition cheat-code ------once upon a time i used to grind all night / with dat coke residue that was ipod white ------ --i took trips with so much shit in the whip / that if the cops pulled us over the dogs would get sick (sniff) ------ i put my lifetime in between the paper's lines / i'm da quiet storm nigga who fight rhyme ------brain cells are lit ideas start to hit / next the formation of words dat fit / at da table i sit making it legit / when my pen hits da paper...aah shit -------i save money while u spendin ure doe / i must stash like da hair between your lip & your nose ------age don't count in the booth / when your flow stayed submerged in the fountain of youth -------when i'm writing i'm trapped in between the lines / i escape when i finish da rhyme - ------if we can't eat together then u aint my mans / so when u see me in da streets dont shake my hand- -----money is da root of all evil / dats why u always gotta now where u stand with your people--------i can show u how to gamble your money, handle a gun / & be a family man & go home to your sun- -------black diamonds in my jesus-piece / MY GOD-------its like da ball be over the plate & they dont call it a strike- ------i'm a gangsta & a gentleman, show you both sides of the coin / knife at your throat-gun at your groin- --------my testimonial be "death to a phony mc / you wanna impress me, show me a ki--------lord knows what homey would do if i showed him da 9 / a one-eyed man is king in the land of the blind--------on da road to riches & diamond rings / in the land of the blind a man with one eye is the king--------you lack the minerals & vitamins, iron & the niacin--------stares get exchanged then the 5th come out / the tough guy disappears then the bitch come out--------if you got a bith you dont argue with dat bitch / you dont listen to dat bitch all you do is fuck dat bitch-------know da bitch b4 you call yourself lovin it / nogga wit a benz fuckin it------went from $20Gs for blow to $30gs a show / to orgies wit hoes i never seen befo'-------i'm intelectual; passed more essays / than police motorcade parades thru east l.a.-------DEAD IN THE MIDDLE OF LITTLE ITALY LITTLE DID WE KNOW / WE RIDDLED SOME MIDDLE-MAN WHO DIDN'T DO DIDDLY-------visualizing the realism of life in actuality / fuck who's da baddest; a person's status depends on salary-------mechanical movement, understandable smooth shit / that murderers move with-the thief's theme--------DEEP LIKE "THE SHINING" SPARKLE LIKE A DIAMOND / SNEAK AN UZI ON DA ISLAND IN MY ARMY JACKET LINING / HIT THE EARTH LIKE A COMET - INVASION / NAS IS LIKE THE AFRO-CENTRIC ASIAN; ½ MAN, ½ AMAZING-------& why certainly i'm squirtin / bust a nut then get up & wipe my dick on your curtain-------walk by your casket & spit in your face--------i know how to get my peers off me / make 'em cry & die from high blood-pressure cuz tears are salty-------i'm not trying to give you love & affection / i'm tryna give you 60 seconds of erection / then im'a give you cab fare & directions / get your independent ass outta here - question?---------black cat is bad luck; bad guys wear black / must've been a white guy who started all that--------either you're slinging crack-rocks or you got a wicked jumpshot--------all us blacks got is sports & entertainment--------2 many athletes, actors & rappers / but not enough niggaz at nasa - ------why did bush knock down the towers?--------I REACT LIKE MIKE / ANY ONE TY-SON, JOR-DAN, JACK-SON / action, pack gunz, ridiculous--------all the teachers couldn't reach me & my mom couldn't beat me / hard enough to make up for my pop not seeing me---------kings from queens, from queens comes kings / we're raising hell like a class when the lunch bell rings---------excuse me miss, can i give you a minute? / may i buy you a glass of ice with liquor in it?--------what goes around comes around i figure / now we got white kids calling themselves nigga / the tables turn as the crosses burn...---------YOU LOVE TO HEAR THE STORY AGAIN & AGAIN / OF HOW IT ALL GOT STARTED WAY BACK WHEN--------i guess they got a grudge cause i won't budge / playin tough, staring down the judge with my hands cuffed---------A CHILD IS BORN WITH NO STATE OF MIND / BLIND TO THE WAYS OF MANKIND--------who shot biggie smalls? if we don't get them they gon' get us all / i'm down to run up pn them crackers in their city hall----------its kinda hard to be optimistic / when your homey is laying dead in a casket----------they say the blacker the berry; the sweeter the juice / i say the darker the flesh; then the deeper the roots---------i took your breath away then we'd perform cpr---------there's no real way it can be explained / i guess its just the way i smile when i hear your name--------CASH RULES EVERYTHING AROUND ME / C.R.E.A.M. GET THE MONEY, DOLLAR DOLLAR BILL Y'AAAAALL------------see I’m a poet to some, a regular modern day shakespeare / jesus christ the king of these latter day saints here / To shatter the picture in which of that as they paint me as / a monger of hate and satan a scatter-brained atheist--------i remember marvin gaye used to sing to me / he had me feeling like black was the thing to be------------this be that put-you-out-your-misery song / that makes you ask your man 'is this the joint he's dissin me on?'---------foul all your life now ure 90 / on ure death bed u regret being grimey---------INDUSTRY RULE #4080, RECORD COMPANY PEOPLE ARE SHAAADYYYY / so kids watch your back cause i think they smoke crack---------society's a weak excuse for a man-----------planet earth my place of birth / born to be the sole controller of the universe---------the mic had my prints, on on it was a body---------a squealer tells, but the dealer still sells---------some young male put in jail / lawyer so good his bail was on sale----------i'm just takin a piss......unless you're gonna do it----------fuck street clothes, we thug it out in tuxedos / stomp niggaz with hard bottoms in casinos--------people higher up have the lowest self-esteem / & the prettiest people do the ugliest things-----------IF YOU ADMIRE SOMEONE YOU SHOULD GO 'HEAD & TELL 'EM / PEOPLE NEVER GET THE ROSES WHILE THEY CAN STILL SMELL 'EM-----------goddamn, what a nigga gotta do to make a million / without the fbi catching feelings--------i got a story to tell / in these streets we got drugs & guns for sale---------we keep the nine tucked chop dimes up rap about it / wild out fuck niggaz up laugh about it---------- read between tha lines of ya eyes and ya brows / ya handshake aint matchin ya smile---------what the fuck i rap for? to push a fuckin rav-4?-------fuck all the glamour & glitz, i plan to get rich / i'm from new york & never was a fan of the knicks----------the white boy blossomed after dre endorsed him / his flow on renegade-fuckin awesome...applaud him-------before i start you know i gotta / pay homage & respects to afrika bambaata---------DRUGS IS THE KEY TO SUCCESS / MONEY IS THE KEY TO SEX------i pimped my crib so i must exhibit------- I - WILL - NOT - LOSE !
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